It is interesting to me how we recognize things around us more clearly when they are fresh on our minds. For example when you get a new vehicle you suddenly notice all of the other vehicles on the road that are exactly like yours. You find yourself thinking that you must have good taste since everyone seems to have the car you chose. Why did I never notice all of those cars before? They were always there, I just didn't possess one so I never paid them any attention. I feel like a similar "recognition" has been happening to me since I've acknowledged my lack of contentment issue. My Beth Moore study segment for this week has really spoken to me on this issue. I have been listening to an alternative christian rock station here this week that has had several mini messages on contentment...things that I'm sure are regular messages for them but things that wouldn't have caught my attention before. I have found several scriptures this week that I have wondered why I never discovered before in previous reading. I know...God is hard at work and I am very excited.
As I was driving around town the other day I started having a lot of memories from high school floating around in my mind. I started thinking about all my old friends and all the dreams we had for ourselves. I wondered what it would be like if I was suddenly transported back in time to my senior year knowing everything I know now. The first thing I starting thinking of was all the things I would change about my life, but as I really remembered all of my teenage hopes it occured to me that God has answered most all of my heart's desires since that time. I grew up with a very secure and loving family environment, but I had so many friends who didn't. One of my biggest desires was to have a wonderful, devoted, and loving husband and God more than supplied that for me in Brandon. I always wanted kids and though it seemed for a short time that God had different plans, again I was blessed beyond measure with Peyton and Ryan. I had a desire to be a stay at home mom and God supplied my husband with an awesome job that allows me to do that. I wanted wonderful, close friends who would love me for who I am and although those are few, God has brought me a wonderful "choosen family" that I get to do life with daily. My list could go on and on with all the provisions he has graciously given. I am astonished after realizing all of those things that I struggle being content.
My Beth Moore study this week was very convicting and insightful. This week's lessons focused on the first half of Exodus and the journey into the wilderness for the children of Israel. God was very physically present among his people during this time and through his closeness with these people he tested them often. Beth Moore pointed out that not all of God's tests are hardships, but He often tests us through abundance and prosperity. Personally, I had never acknowledged that revelation before. Usually, I only feel tested when things start to suck! This testing proves our character and Beth went on to say that our character is often at greater risk in prosperity than in adversity. This is a little segment from that lesson:
In the wilderness of sin God set a test before His children. In essence He responded to their grumblings like this: "I have shown you My presence again and again. I have intervened on your behalf with signs and wonders. I have healed your bitter water and have led you to the palms. I have also let you go hungry so that you would know that it is I who feeds you. Now I will put you through the hardest test of all: I will let you grow accustomed to My presence. I will feed you from My table daily and prove who you really are. Will you grow in awe, or will you grow cold?"
Sadly I must say that lately I have grown cold...or lukewarm, which is actually worse. God has provided so much in abundance the past several years. This past year in particular with our move to Hutto and starting this new church. He has been faithful and continues to show up time after time. I expect Him to be there instead of seeking and inviting Him to be there. Just like any romantic relationship needs pursuit to keep the fire going, so does my relationship with God. Gifts received from a stranger or mere aquaintance can easily be thrown away,pushed aside, or taken for granted. Gifts received from a loved one seem to have so much more value because of the heart behind them. Maybe if I valued the Giver of all my blessings a little more my heart would be content. Good things to pray about!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
A Mommy's Interpretation of 1 Corinthians 13
God has been working on my relationship with my kids alot during this time of being a single parent while Brandon is away. I feel like Peyton and I have made so much progress and a lot of my frustrations with our interactions has melted away. I found this beautiful interpretation on a friend's blog this morning and it made me cry. I wanted to share it with all of my other mommy friends and hope it brings new light to loving our precious gifts from God.
"If I’m poetic and profound all day but don’t love my kids, I’m just like an annoying never-ending educational film.
If I teach my kids to memorize the whole Bible, giving my kids a deep understanding of God’s mysteries and making academics a breeze for them; if I have trained them to clean the whole house when I snap my fingers, to be quiet, still and compliant, but don’t love my kids, I’m worse than a dead-beat parent refusing to pay child support.
If I don’t buy myself jewelry, new clothes or anything nice ever again, but spend every penny on my children, if I’m a real “martyr mom” staying up all night working on their birthday parties, Halloween costumes, and decorating their rooms, but don’t love them personally and deeply, they might as well be orphans.
So no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m worse than useless without love.
Loving my kids means never giving up (on them, on their father, on the family, on their future.)
Love is patient with a “screamer,” kind to a “brat.”
Love cares more for her children’s joyful fulfillment than for her own “self-actualization”.
Love doesn’t expect her kids to be something they’re not, doesn’t wish they were more like somebody else’s kids. Doesn’t brag about their achievements and live for that vicarious glory.
Love doesn’t tyrannize her children, or rudely wish they’d go away.
Love doesn’t condescend to her kids or force her own paradigms and agendas on them. Isn’t always “me first.” But loves them with reckless abandon (sometimes saying goodbye forever to careers, traveling the world, old interests and dreams, and, of course, that “bikini body!”)
Love doesn’t fly off the handle or scream at her children. Doesn’t yank them around or cringe in embarrassment when they just act like kids. Doesn’t tally up the disobedience from the whole week and get progressively furious. Especially doesn’t get angry with one child because another has been misbehaving.
Love doesn’t revel when her kids grovel, doesn’t gloat when they finally feel terrible for their offenses.
Love delights when her children grow in truth, beaming when they first glimpse God’s holy light.
Love protects these precious people, guarding their bodies, hearts, and minds.
Love puts up with anything (a sick baby, a handicap, another “accident” on the new carpet.)Always trusts God with her children (even when he seems to have such a different plan for them.)Constantly looks for the best in her kids (even if it’s not what was expected.)Never looks back (at life before kids!)But keeps going (mothering) to the end.
Love never dies.
Love is eternal.
Love thinks about her children, praying for them, each day of her entire life.
We have three things to do for our children: Trust God to be glorious in their lives, be a pillar of hope by expecting his best for them, and love them wildly."
"If I’m poetic and profound all day but don’t love my kids, I’m just like an annoying never-ending educational film.
If I teach my kids to memorize the whole Bible, giving my kids a deep understanding of God’s mysteries and making academics a breeze for them; if I have trained them to clean the whole house when I snap my fingers, to be quiet, still and compliant, but don’t love my kids, I’m worse than a dead-beat parent refusing to pay child support.
If I don’t buy myself jewelry, new clothes or anything nice ever again, but spend every penny on my children, if I’m a real “martyr mom” staying up all night working on their birthday parties, Halloween costumes, and decorating their rooms, but don’t love them personally and deeply, they might as well be orphans.
So no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m worse than useless without love.
Loving my kids means never giving up (on them, on their father, on the family, on their future.)
Love is patient with a “screamer,” kind to a “brat.”
Love cares more for her children’s joyful fulfillment than for her own “self-actualization”.
Love doesn’t expect her kids to be something they’re not, doesn’t wish they were more like somebody else’s kids. Doesn’t brag about their achievements and live for that vicarious glory.
Love doesn’t tyrannize her children, or rudely wish they’d go away.
Love doesn’t condescend to her kids or force her own paradigms and agendas on them. Isn’t always “me first.” But loves them with reckless abandon (sometimes saying goodbye forever to careers, traveling the world, old interests and dreams, and, of course, that “bikini body!”)
Love doesn’t fly off the handle or scream at her children. Doesn’t yank them around or cringe in embarrassment when they just act like kids. Doesn’t tally up the disobedience from the whole week and get progressively furious. Especially doesn’t get angry with one child because another has been misbehaving.
Love doesn’t revel when her kids grovel, doesn’t gloat when they finally feel terrible for their offenses.
Love delights when her children grow in truth, beaming when they first glimpse God’s holy light.
Love protects these precious people, guarding their bodies, hearts, and minds.
Love puts up with anything (a sick baby, a handicap, another “accident” on the new carpet.)Always trusts God with her children (even when he seems to have such a different plan for them.)Constantly looks for the best in her kids (even if it’s not what was expected.)Never looks back (at life before kids!)But keeps going (mothering) to the end.
Love never dies.
Love is eternal.
Love thinks about her children, praying for them, each day of her entire life.
We have three things to do for our children: Trust God to be glorious in their lives, be a pillar of hope by expecting his best for them, and love them wildly."
I Rock!
So Brandon talked me into playing Fantasy Football with him this year and I must say that I am having a lot of fun. He has done it for years and I always rolled my eyes hearing every detail about all of his players and their stats. I thought it was pretty silly, but I have changed my mind. He was so excited when I told him I would play this year and he bugged me for weeks ahead of time about who I was going to choose in my draft. I am not the huge football fanatic that he is so I had to print out a list of all the players and I just kind of ranked them all according to who I remebered hearing about. Couldn't tell you what half of them looked like or what team they were on when I picked, but apparently I'm pretty good at this fantasy football.
There are 12 teams on our league, most of them guys, in fact our league name is Texas Boys. I don't know if the founder was trying to discourage female participation or what but I'm sure he's wishing that was the case (right Brent?) I named my team Mama Rules and I picked a damn good name because I am kicking everybody's arse right now! I am the only team who is undefeated. I was the highest scorer this past week and am the top scoring team overall. I have the #1 quarterback (and no I didn't pick Peyton Manning), #3 and 4 running backs, and the #7 reciever. Who knew my team would rock! I realize we are just 3 weeks into the season, but I play Brandon's team this week and he sucks. So I will be 4-0 next week. This Mama Rules! :-)
There are 12 teams on our league, most of them guys, in fact our league name is Texas Boys. I don't know if the founder was trying to discourage female participation or what but I'm sure he's wishing that was the case (right Brent?) I named my team Mama Rules and I picked a damn good name because I am kicking everybody's arse right now! I am the only team who is undefeated. I was the highest scorer this past week and am the top scoring team overall. I have the #1 quarterback (and no I didn't pick Peyton Manning), #3 and 4 running backs, and the #7 reciever. Who knew my team would rock! I realize we are just 3 weeks into the season, but I play Brandon's team this week and he sucks. So I will be 4-0 next week. This Mama Rules! :-)
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Daddy Day
This weekend has gone by way too fast. Brandon was able to come spend a day with us and it was the first time the kids have seen him in almost 3 weeks. Feels like it had already been months since we last saw him. He got in late Friday night and had to leave early this morning after breakfast. He's already back in Dallas and hard at work again. Brandon told me that he added up his hours that he worked last week and from Monday to Friday he had 83 hours. That doesn't count the entire day last Sunday that he worked so he is definately a bit stressed out right now. I've never seen him so exhausted as he was while he was here. He slept in Sat. morning and pretty much napped any time we weren't doing anything yesterday. We took Peyton and Ryan to the zoo and that was our main event yesterday. The kids and I were just so happy to see him that it didn't matter that we laid around the rest of the day!
This morning was hard...I started trying to prepare Peyton yesterday for daddy leaving today but it still didn't go well. She stood in the driveway screaming his name and crying as he drove off this morning. She has been extremely moody today so I'm trying extra hard to keep her entertained. We just got back from Gattiland and she is down for a nap. Hopefully she will wake up in a happy mood! Three weeks down, three more to go.
Brandon if you are reading this, thank you for coming home this weekend! We had fun and lots of good daddy time. I'm praying for you this week and hope we get to see you again soon. Love you!
This morning was hard...I started trying to prepare Peyton yesterday for daddy leaving today but it still didn't go well. She stood in the driveway screaming his name and crying as he drove off this morning. She has been extremely moody today so I'm trying extra hard to keep her entertained. We just got back from Gattiland and she is down for a nap. Hopefully she will wake up in a happy mood! Three weeks down, three more to go.
Brandon if you are reading this, thank you for coming home this weekend! We had fun and lots of good daddy time. I'm praying for you this week and hope we get to see you again soon. Love you!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
I Keep Looking
Well, it has been a crazy couple of days. I am in Abilene now visiting my parents while Brandon is still hard at work in Dallas. I didn't intend to come home until the beginning of October, but after a couple of bad nights with the kids I was exhausted and had to call in the reinforcements. So, here I am in the house I grew up in and I am contemplating how I am going to pass the time the next couple of weeks. Abilene is not a big town, but it isn't tiny either. We have an air force base here and I would guess about 160,000 people live here. I just always find myself in a weird emotional place when I get here. Part of me always feels safe being here, but I also feel strangely out of place. Like I left this place behind and should stay gone. My parents have lived here for about 30 years and they have recently decided they would like to move to Austin. I am hopeful that they can and would love to have them close. I'm also afraid that it is a little unrealistic for them to do financially. We'll have to see how all of that works out. Anyhow...I guess what I struggle with most when I am here visiting is a feeling of being stuck.
On the drive here this weekend we passed through several tiny little towns and I found myself wondering how people could live in these places and be happy. What did they do for a living? Where do you shop? What do you do for fun besides tip cows? How did you get stuck here? I just think to myself that these people must be miserable. I would be! And that is where God has just blatently pointed out to me that I am out of touch with reality. I am the most discontent person in the world and I have been all my life. If you look up discontentment in the dictionary you will find that it means not being satisfied, a restless desire or craving for something one does not have. This is my daily struggle, this is part of my depression issue, this is a handicap to all my relationships and the root of my self esteem issues! I just came across an old Sara Evans song that I used to love and it is dead on with what goes on inside me every day. (I don't know how to add the fancy music to my blog, so you'll just have to read the lyrics)
I Keep Looking
Back when I was young
Couldn't wait to grow up
Get away and get out on my own
And looking back now
Ain't it funny how
I've been trying to get back home, yeah
When my low self esteem
Needs a man loving me
And I find me a perfect catch
Then I see my friends
Having wild weekends
Then I don't wanna get quite so attached
Just as soon as I get what I want
I get unsatisfied
Good is good but could be better
I keep looking, I keep looking for
I keep looking for something more
I always wonder what's on the other side
Of the number two door
I keep looking
Looking for something more
Well, the straight haired girls
They all want curls
And the brunettes wanna be blonde
It's your typical thing
You got yin you want yang
It just goes on and on
They say, hey, it's only human
To never be satisfied
Well I guess that I'm as human as the next one
Oh, I keep looking
I keep looking for
I keep looking for something more
I always wonder what's on the other side
Of the number two door
Yeah, I keep looking
Looking for something more
All of the things in the song seem so frivolous, but it goes deeper than that. I am so irritated that this is something that constantly plagues me. I'm also sad that it is still such a big deal with me since I've become a believer. It tells me that I am not trusting God in his promises as my source of joy. It makes me feel like I havn't progressed in my relationship with Christ like I should. This is something that I need to be working on right now. I am glad that these emotions have caused all of this to surface and I am aware. If I honestly look at my attitude lately and any conflict in my life, most of it stems from this problem. Hopefully this time here in Abilene will propel me to search the bible for some solutions to dealing with contentment. I have felt it a lot lately...that empty feeling after buying something you thought would make you happy. Conversations that happen (or don't happen) with people who are suppose to be close, but you can't find any depth that fills you up. Just complete unsatisfaction with myself as far as what I have, where I live, how I look, my daily life routines! Obviously I am looking in all the wrong places for joy.
I am still doing my Beth Moore study...actually I have even more time now to devote to it...and I am getting a lot out of it. I think it will be a very critical first step for getting myself back on track. The entire study is about the construction of the tabernacle as God's dwelling place among his people. This study is translating that building into the construction of our hearts as God's dwelling place. I will try to blog about some of those lessons as I go along. If you struggle with contentment, send me an email and let me know what has helped you out.
On the drive here this weekend we passed through several tiny little towns and I found myself wondering how people could live in these places and be happy. What did they do for a living? Where do you shop? What do you do for fun besides tip cows? How did you get stuck here? I just think to myself that these people must be miserable. I would be! And that is where God has just blatently pointed out to me that I am out of touch with reality. I am the most discontent person in the world and I have been all my life. If you look up discontentment in the dictionary you will find that it means not being satisfied, a restless desire or craving for something one does not have. This is my daily struggle, this is part of my depression issue, this is a handicap to all my relationships and the root of my self esteem issues! I just came across an old Sara Evans song that I used to love and it is dead on with what goes on inside me every day. (I don't know how to add the fancy music to my blog, so you'll just have to read the lyrics)
I Keep Looking
Back when I was young
Couldn't wait to grow up
Get away and get out on my own
And looking back now
Ain't it funny how
I've been trying to get back home, yeah
When my low self esteem
Needs a man loving me
And I find me a perfect catch
Then I see my friends
Having wild weekends
Then I don't wanna get quite so attached
Just as soon as I get what I want
I get unsatisfied
Good is good but could be better
I keep looking, I keep looking for
I keep looking for something more
I always wonder what's on the other side
Of the number two door
I keep looking
Looking for something more
Well, the straight haired girls
They all want curls
And the brunettes wanna be blonde
It's your typical thing
You got yin you want yang
It just goes on and on
They say, hey, it's only human
To never be satisfied
Well I guess that I'm as human as the next one
Oh, I keep looking
I keep looking for
I keep looking for something more
I always wonder what's on the other side
Of the number two door
Yeah, I keep looking
Looking for something more
All of the things in the song seem so frivolous, but it goes deeper than that. I am so irritated that this is something that constantly plagues me. I'm also sad that it is still such a big deal with me since I've become a believer. It tells me that I am not trusting God in his promises as my source of joy. It makes me feel like I havn't progressed in my relationship with Christ like I should. This is something that I need to be working on right now. I am glad that these emotions have caused all of this to surface and I am aware. If I honestly look at my attitude lately and any conflict in my life, most of it stems from this problem. Hopefully this time here in Abilene will propel me to search the bible for some solutions to dealing with contentment. I have felt it a lot lately...that empty feeling after buying something you thought would make you happy. Conversations that happen (or don't happen) with people who are suppose to be close, but you can't find any depth that fills you up. Just complete unsatisfaction with myself as far as what I have, where I live, how I look, my daily life routines! Obviously I am looking in all the wrong places for joy.
I am still doing my Beth Moore study...actually I have even more time now to devote to it...and I am getting a lot out of it. I think it will be a very critical first step for getting myself back on track. The entire study is about the construction of the tabernacle as God's dwelling place among his people. This study is translating that building into the construction of our hearts as God's dwelling place. I will try to blog about some of those lessons as I go along. If you struggle with contentment, send me an email and let me know what has helped you out.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Good Start
I am so amazed at how getting into God's word can totally turn my entire being upside down. I just finished my first day of homework in the Beth Moore study I am doing called A Woman's Heart, God's Dwelling Place and I almost can't even describe how amazing I am feeling. I didn't sleep well last night and Ryan got up at 5:45 this morning to eat. He finished his bottle and I put him back in his crib at 6:15 and I so wanted to crawl back into bed and try and sleep another hour. I knew though that if I was going to be successful at this study that I just started yesterday that I needed to make myself go downstairs and do Day One. If I wait until evening when the kids go to bed, I rush through it so I can go to sleep because I am exhausted being a single parent at the moment. The war in your mind when you really don't want to make yourself do something can be pretty intense. I was actually stumbling down the stairs this morning and feeling quite miserable and already trying to start my personal pity party for the day. Anyhow...I got my bible out and said a quick prayer to get started. Then I hear Ryan crying and I'm just thinking to myself "I'm trying God, can you just please help me out!" I decide to go ahead and press on, hoping Ryan doesn't wake his sister since that will really put an end to my lesson. After 15 minutes, Ryan is back asleep and I was fully engaged in my study. I spent 45 minutes in God's word this morning and I can't believe what a different place I am in mentally right now! I am not feeling physically exhausted anymore. I'm sitting here crying right now because I have missed this connection with God. It has been a year since I have spent this much time with Him and I am wondering how I have let myself be so disconnected with him. I have more hope this morning than I have had in a long time. This past week of being alone has been very disheartening to me, but I know that if I wasn't going through this right now I would still be living everyday relying on myself or Brandon to get me through. You might even be thinking as you are reading this that I must be a new believer if I'm just now realizing all of this. I've been a Christ follower for about 8 years now. Unfortuantely instead of walking beside Him or even right behind Him, I have stood still and let him become a speck in my line of vision. I am ready to move forward and I am praying that I will fearlessly pursue Him. I know He is standing there waiting for me knowing I have realized that any changes he is going to ask me to make in my life are going to be welcome to the stale existance I've lived the past year.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Crazy ideas
I love to listen to music and I absolutely love to sing. Unfortunately my singing voice is not very pleasant to hear....even my 2 year old has come over and covered my mouth with her hand in a nice request for me to stop butchering whatever song she is trying to enjoy. If God ever told me that he would change anything about myself to be whatever I wanted, I would actually take a singing voice over bigger boobs (obviously that is not on the list of blessings for Cindy since I was totally cheated of ever having any despite two pregnancies!) I really wish I could sing! I would do it for a living and love it! But, I don't think that voice lessons would be able to help so I will just continue to sing in my car and the shower.
I do feel like I have pretty good musical skills. I took piano lessons when I was in elementary school and I played until college. I can read music and would probably still play some if I actually had a piano. My parents sold theirs when I moved out since I was the only one who used it. I played the violin for 2 years as well. I wasn't as good at that and that was mainly because I lost interest in it quickly and never practiced. My parents didn't appreciate my flip decision and made me continue playing since they spent all the money on the nice violin. I hated it so much that I use to compete for last chair when I was in high school orchestra! There was another girl who was being forced to endure orchestra with our horrible teacher(Mr. Best...I think he was arrested for some reason last year) and we decided it was much more fun to sit at the very back and visit during class instead of playing. Every week each violin had to play a short piece of music to see where you would sit. Obviously the best musician would have the first seat and whatever number chair you ended up determined how good you were. Hillary and I would honestly compete to see who would be last chair. We would suck so bad that some people would laugh when we got done playing. Our teacher was so disgusted by the end of the semester that I don't think he made us play anymore...she and I just switched seats everyday so we could talk to different people and get everyone else in trouble.
I have always thought it would be really cool to play the drums. That request was denied by the parents when I was in high school...we didn't have money to buy a drum set anyways. My last boyfriend before I met Brandon attempted to play the drums. (Actually, if you've ever been to Disney World in Florida and had your picture taken with Goofey, then you have a photo of yourself with my ex. Yes...he is a LOOSER!) Anyhow, Scott never took lessons. He just kind of taught himself, but he would occasionally let me play around on his drums. He didn't take me very seriously when I told him I wanted to learn. Actually I'm sure he probably knew that I would be better at it than him and felt threatened by that!
Well, for some reason I have really had the drum playing thing on my mind lately. I would talk to Brandon about it, but then I would tell myself that I am too old to try and learn how to do that now. I'm a stay at home mom...when am I going to have time to take lessons? Plus, my kids go to bed at 8 so when and where would I be able to practice! I think the more I talked about it, the more intrigued my husband became. He suggested that he would get me a drum set for Christmas if this was something I really wanted to do and would make myself practice. I actually found a drummer last week who will be teaching soon and offered to give me lessons. So, I guess I'm going to have an early mid-life crisis and try to become a rock star! I do have my nose pierced so I may as well try to become a bad ass drummer. My friend Amanda (who happens to already resemble Pink) is wanting to learn to play the guitar. We'll just both take our lessons and start our own band! And our children will be totally embarrased by their mom's rocking out in the garage when their friends want to come over and hang after school! I'm just kidding....I hope Peyton will want to learn to play too...she already has the attitude!
I do feel like I have pretty good musical skills. I took piano lessons when I was in elementary school and I played until college. I can read music and would probably still play some if I actually had a piano. My parents sold theirs when I moved out since I was the only one who used it. I played the violin for 2 years as well. I wasn't as good at that and that was mainly because I lost interest in it quickly and never practiced. My parents didn't appreciate my flip decision and made me continue playing since they spent all the money on the nice violin. I hated it so much that I use to compete for last chair when I was in high school orchestra! There was another girl who was being forced to endure orchestra with our horrible teacher(Mr. Best...I think he was arrested for some reason last year) and we decided it was much more fun to sit at the very back and visit during class instead of playing. Every week each violin had to play a short piece of music to see where you would sit. Obviously the best musician would have the first seat and whatever number chair you ended up determined how good you were. Hillary and I would honestly compete to see who would be last chair. We would suck so bad that some people would laugh when we got done playing. Our teacher was so disgusted by the end of the semester that I don't think he made us play anymore...she and I just switched seats everyday so we could talk to different people and get everyone else in trouble.
I have always thought it would be really cool to play the drums. That request was denied by the parents when I was in high school...we didn't have money to buy a drum set anyways. My last boyfriend before I met Brandon attempted to play the drums. (Actually, if you've ever been to Disney World in Florida and had your picture taken with Goofey, then you have a photo of yourself with my ex. Yes...he is a LOOSER!) Anyhow, Scott never took lessons. He just kind of taught himself, but he would occasionally let me play around on his drums. He didn't take me very seriously when I told him I wanted to learn. Actually I'm sure he probably knew that I would be better at it than him and felt threatened by that!
Well, for some reason I have really had the drum playing thing on my mind lately. I would talk to Brandon about it, but then I would tell myself that I am too old to try and learn how to do that now. I'm a stay at home mom...when am I going to have time to take lessons? Plus, my kids go to bed at 8 so when and where would I be able to practice! I think the more I talked about it, the more intrigued my husband became. He suggested that he would get me a drum set for Christmas if this was something I really wanted to do and would make myself practice. I actually found a drummer last week who will be teaching soon and offered to give me lessons. So, I guess I'm going to have an early mid-life crisis and try to become a rock star! I do have my nose pierced so I may as well try to become a bad ass drummer. My friend Amanda (who happens to already resemble Pink) is wanting to learn to play the guitar. We'll just both take our lessons and start our own band! And our children will be totally embarrased by their mom's rocking out in the garage when their friends want to come over and hang after school! I'm just kidding....I hope Peyton will want to learn to play too...she already has the attitude!
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Halloween Costume Ideas?
O.k. I know it's a little early, but I'm trying to decide what to do for the kids Halloween costumes this year. I would like to do something for Ryan and Peyton that are related or match in some way. I spent an hour online this morning looking at costumes. I've only found a few things I like. I found an adorable Peter Pan costume for Ryan and I could have Peyton be Tinkerbell. Or, I found a cool Superman costume and Peyton could either be Supergirl or Wonderwoman. I'm so not into super heros at all....is Supergirl a real character or just a cheesy excuse to have a girl superman costume? I used to like Wonderwoman and the costume is really cute, but will work if it's not cold since it is sleeveless and has a skirt. Wonderwoman doesn't have a male counterpart does she? Anyhow...let me know your thoughts!
Back to Blogging
Brandon left this morning for his month and half long trip. I have no idea when I will see him or how often between now and the end of October. He leaves the country on Saturday and will be overseas for the week and then he will be in Dallas the rest of the time. Please pray that he has a safe trip. I decided to stay here for the entire month of September with the kids. My plan is to go to Abilene the first two weeks of October. I'm sure by then I will be in desparate need of a break! So, now that I'm home alone with no one to have a decent conversation with I'm sure I will be blogging a bit more than usual! Peyton will be going to mother's day out every day this month so I will have a little bit of a break for at least 4 hours every day. Ryan is teething right now and it is sucking! He cries all the time and we still don't have one tooth yet. I don't remember Peyton having a hard time at all when she got teeth so this is a new thing I'm dealing with. I thought we had Peyton's potty training down, but I was wrong! The first two weeks we started she had hardly any accidents and loved going to the potty. I was excited because I hadn't expected it to be so easy. We were wearing pull ups and everything was going great. For some reason on the 3rd week she decided going to the potty wasn't so cool after all. We have battled and struggled the past two weeks. She doesn't want to go and gets upset when you take her in there and make her sit. She will purposely wait until you put a new pull up on her and then she'll go after she just got off the potty. So, I am not willing to keep spending a fortune on the pull ups and fighting with her so we are back in diapers. One of my friends had a similar thing happen with her daughter and their doctor told her that she wasn't ready to be potty trained. I figured we would wait another couple of months and try again. Peyton has all kinds of issues when Brandon is gone anyways so I'm not going to add to it! Peyton will be starting dance class next week. It is a 30 minute class that is a combo of tap and ballet for 2 year olds. I'm hoping that goes well. I think she is going to love it! Anytime there is music playing she starts dancing and she watched her friend Kylie do this class last year and she is always copying what she saw Kylie do.
I hope this month goes by quickly! I am going to try and keep myself busy. I signed up for a Beth Moore study on Tuesday mornings with Lifepoint. We've got enough things going on with our own church that should help fill the time as well. Who knows, maybe this time alone with the kids will be wonderful! Maybe I'll get some new habits and routines started so I'm not so bored and down all the time. I bought a new pilates work out video today. It has 5 different 10 minute workouts targeting separate areas of the body. I figured I would start with that since I'm working out 0 minutes a day at the moment. I'll let you know how that goes later this week!
I hope this month goes by quickly! I am going to try and keep myself busy. I signed up for a Beth Moore study on Tuesday mornings with Lifepoint. We've got enough things going on with our own church that should help fill the time as well. Who knows, maybe this time alone with the kids will be wonderful! Maybe I'll get some new habits and routines started so I'm not so bored and down all the time. I bought a new pilates work out video today. It has 5 different 10 minute workouts targeting separate areas of the body. I figured I would start with that since I'm working out 0 minutes a day at the moment. I'll let you know how that goes later this week!
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