I know everybody wants a Fantasy Football update so here you go....
I am now 6 and 0 (thank you Brent for sucking this week!) and still the points leader in the league!
My husband, the football expert, is 3 and 3 and towards the bottom of the points.
This is pretty fun! :-) Too bad you don't win lots of money in this league!
Monday, October 15, 2007
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Give Me a Break!
"In every generation there seem to exist certain cliches used by members of the body of Christ. No doubt, on the top of the list for this generation are the words 'I'm under attack!' Every difficulty seems to be labeled 'spiritual warfare.' Without question we fight wars in the heavenlies; but before we can be sure it's spiritual warfare, we must be able to answer three questions negatively: 1. Am I living outside the will of God? 2. Do I have any unconfessed sin? 3. Is God simply working His completion in me? Far more often, our difficulties originate from one of these three realms." - Henry Blackaby
This quote was from my Beth Moore study this week. Right now, we are beginning to construct the tabernacle among this camp of Israelites God has led into the wilderness and the study pointed out that the children of Israel were on the toughest battlefield of their nation's history, facing the most vicious enemy of all: themselves. Satan was not at war with these people during this time although this would have been a very opportune time for him to strike. God was present in so many ways and yet these people struggled!
Romans 7:14-25 (The Message)
14-16 I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.
17-20 But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.
21-23 It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.
24 I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?
25 The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.
I know my greatest battle is within myself, the war constantly going on in my mind. It is truely the hardest thing to control...sometimes I feel like I have no control! Beth pointed out that once we know how, we do not hesitate rebuking Satan, because we despise him. On the other hand, we dearly love our own flesh and have far more difficulty rebuking it. I myself have said several times that I feel like Satan is just attacking me right and left, but is he really? I think I do enough to myself that he doesn't have much to stir up. I definately don't investigate the three questions above often enough...how much easier it is just to blame it on "spiritual warfare".
This topic has given me a lot to think about this week. I have been feeling defeated a lot the past 3 weeks. For some reason, our family has just been plagued with sickness. Peyton had the stomach virus, Ryan has had a two week sinus infection, and just 2 days ago Brandon and I both had a vicious stomach virus within the same 24 hour period. That was fun...trying to take care of a 2 year old and 7 month old while taking turns running to the bathroom to vomit! So, I feel like I've aged by a year with the sleep depravation! As I was sitting with Ryan at 3 am this morning trying to get him back to sleep and crying myself, I found myself saying the same prayer I think I've said every night for a month now! "God, please heal my kids, get rid of their sickness, give everyone comfort to sleep peacefully through the night, give me the rest I desparately need and the energy to make it through the day with so little sleep. Please let me sleep and feel rested!" I was getting so frustrated last night thinking why is my prayer falling on deaf ears! I just assumed early this week that obviously God has something big planned for us at the other end of this and Satan is just wearing me down! Maybe Satan isn't even in this picture and I need to spend my awake time (all the time it seems) answering those 3 questions.
This quote was from my Beth Moore study this week. Right now, we are beginning to construct the tabernacle among this camp of Israelites God has led into the wilderness and the study pointed out that the children of Israel were on the toughest battlefield of their nation's history, facing the most vicious enemy of all: themselves. Satan was not at war with these people during this time although this would have been a very opportune time for him to strike. God was present in so many ways and yet these people struggled!
Romans 7:14-25 (The Message)
14-16 I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.
17-20 But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.
21-23 It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.
24 I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question?
25 The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.
I know my greatest battle is within myself, the war constantly going on in my mind. It is truely the hardest thing to control...sometimes I feel like I have no control! Beth pointed out that once we know how, we do not hesitate rebuking Satan, because we despise him. On the other hand, we dearly love our own flesh and have far more difficulty rebuking it. I myself have said several times that I feel like Satan is just attacking me right and left, but is he really? I think I do enough to myself that he doesn't have much to stir up. I definately don't investigate the three questions above often enough...how much easier it is just to blame it on "spiritual warfare".
This topic has given me a lot to think about this week. I have been feeling defeated a lot the past 3 weeks. For some reason, our family has just been plagued with sickness. Peyton had the stomach virus, Ryan has had a two week sinus infection, and just 2 days ago Brandon and I both had a vicious stomach virus within the same 24 hour period. That was fun...trying to take care of a 2 year old and 7 month old while taking turns running to the bathroom to vomit! So, I feel like I've aged by a year with the sleep depravation! As I was sitting with Ryan at 3 am this morning trying to get him back to sleep and crying myself, I found myself saying the same prayer I think I've said every night for a month now! "God, please heal my kids, get rid of their sickness, give everyone comfort to sleep peacefully through the night, give me the rest I desparately need and the energy to make it through the day with so little sleep. Please let me sleep and feel rested!" I was getting so frustrated last night thinking why is my prayer falling on deaf ears! I just assumed early this week that obviously God has something big planned for us at the other end of this and Satan is just wearing me down! Maybe Satan isn't even in this picture and I need to spend my awake time (all the time it seems) answering those 3 questions.
Monday, October 8, 2007
I love my home!
We made it home Sat. evening and are so happy to be back! Brandon kept saying yesterday how he loves our home and I can't agree more. Peyton seems so much more at peace and she is obviously excited to be back in her room with her daddy putting her to bed at night. Our wonderful friend Jeremy came over before we arrived Sat. and mowed our lawn. That was such a nice surprise to come home too because we both expected to see a jungle and Brandon had planned on spending Sunday morning doing the yard work. Thanks Jeremy! Brandon got to relax yesterday instead and do not much of anything but watch football and play with the kids.
Ryan is still sick and not sleeping well. He started throwing up this morning and I was so afraid he had gotten the stomach virus that Peyton had on top of his sinus infection, but we seem to have things under control this afternoon. I think he's just had so much drainage that it was upsetting his stomach and made him a little sick. He's been sleeping most of the afternoon so I was able to cram in three days of Beth Moore study. I don't know that I'll get to go to my study tommorow since he's not feeling well...I can't take him with me and leave him in the childcare. Anyhow...this weeks study has been really good and I will blog about that soon.
I realize that this blog is really plain and boring. I am going to have to have some of you blogging friends come over soon and show me how to post pictures, add links, and throw in some music. I don't know how to do any of that stuff! Well, Ryan is screaming again and Peyton just pooped in her princess panties and painted her face with finger paint so guess I better hold down the fort!
Ryan is still sick and not sleeping well. He started throwing up this morning and I was so afraid he had gotten the stomach virus that Peyton had on top of his sinus infection, but we seem to have things under control this afternoon. I think he's just had so much drainage that it was upsetting his stomach and made him a little sick. He's been sleeping most of the afternoon so I was able to cram in three days of Beth Moore study. I don't know that I'll get to go to my study tommorow since he's not feeling well...I can't take him with me and leave him in the childcare. Anyhow...this weeks study has been really good and I will blog about that soon.
I realize that this blog is really plain and boring. I am going to have to have some of you blogging friends come over soon and show me how to post pictures, add links, and throw in some music. I don't know how to do any of that stuff! Well, Ryan is screaming again and Peyton just pooped in her princess panties and painted her face with finger paint so guess I better hold down the fort!
Friday, October 5, 2007
Yeah it's Friday!
Brandon is going to try and leave Dallas at lunch time so hopefully I will get to see him in just a few hours! I have missed him so much the past 5 weeks. Peyton will be thrilled to see him...I think we'll surprise her and let him pick her up from school. I took Ryan back to the doctor this morning after ANOTHER sleepless night. He has a sinus infection so I'm glad we'll have antibiotics this afternoon instead of having to wait till Monday. He ran a really high fever most of the night and is so congested that he can't breathe. I will probably be hallucinating by the time I go to bed tonight since I'm still surviving on such little sleep. Guess I know how Brandon has felt the past few weeks. We decided to go ahead and head home tommorow after lunch. I'm glad...we will be busy just trying to take care of the house when we get home and it will be nice to have half of the weekend to get the yard mowed, everything unpacked, and watch some football hanging out with Daddy. Because come Monday he will be locked in his office. He will be totally swamped with work until after the holidays. I hate that he still has that much stress, but at least we are in the same zip code together again! Well...I have a ton to pack so guess I'd better get busy!
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Better Day
Well, despite the fact that I am operating on only 3 hours of sleep again I can finally see a little light at the end of the tunnel. Brandon will be here tommorow night and then he is taking us all home on Sunday. I enjoy spending time with my parents but I am ready to go home. My kids are ready to go home! Brandon is ready to go home! I'm still not feeling good and will probably be taking myself and my kids to see Dr. Castillos and Dr. Ferrell as soon as we get the chance on Monday. Hopefully just being home will help us all! Maybe with daddy sleeping under the same roof Peyton and Ryan will both finally sleep through the night for the first time in well over a month. Well, Peyton will anyhow, Ryan has decided he likes Brandon's schedule and it has been killing me! The boy gets up between 4 and 5 am every morning and wants to stay up after eating his bottle. He cries himself back to sleep every morning because I do not want to play with him at that ungodly hour. I feel bad, but if it was just him and I could sleep when he slept we could do that but he's not an only child!
I am behind by 3 days now on my Beth Moore study. Hopefully I will get caught up this weekend. If nothing else, I'll do it on the drive back to Austin while Brandon is listening to sports radio. I am really going to have to set a schedule for myself when I get home. I want to be successful with my study, I ordered some new work out DVD's today that I am going to make myself do. I did these workouts when I was first married and it actually got me in awesome shape. I was skinny and eating healthy and a lot happier with myself. I'm going to have to work extra hard now after 2 babies. So, I've got to make time for that everyday. Plus Brandon and I have decided to do a bible study of our own. I picked out one today that looks pretty cool. It is a Tommy Nelson study so it will be good. It's called DREAM TEAM: The power of two. It is a study designed to strengthen your marriage and I think it is going to benefit both of us. We could always use good stuff like this, but it is particuarly good for us after this season (the work from hell season) of our marriage. I've only done one other Tommy Nelson study and it was great...we actually went to his church in Denton for a short time when we moved to Providence but didn't find personal connections in that church. I also used to hear him speak at Prestonwood to the singles every week before we got married. I'll let you know how that study is going too....maybe we could lead a marriage study at some point if there is a need at Resonate. So, as you can see my plate is going to be pretty full as far as my time to myself. You only get a small amount of mommy time when you have 2 kids running around on totally different schedules.
I hope that I keep up the blogging too when I get home. It is very helpful to write out all the thoughts that circulate in my head...most of the time anyhow! I am sorry if my last post sounded a little harsh...I didn't intend to make it sound like things weren't going well. I was extremely tired and frustrated and suffered from what my husband calls "verbal diarrhea". And I am rambling right now so I will bring this to an end. Please pray that we have a safe trip home! :-)
I am behind by 3 days now on my Beth Moore study. Hopefully I will get caught up this weekend. If nothing else, I'll do it on the drive back to Austin while Brandon is listening to sports radio. I am really going to have to set a schedule for myself when I get home. I want to be successful with my study, I ordered some new work out DVD's today that I am going to make myself do. I did these workouts when I was first married and it actually got me in awesome shape. I was skinny and eating healthy and a lot happier with myself. I'm going to have to work extra hard now after 2 babies. So, I've got to make time for that everyday. Plus Brandon and I have decided to do a bible study of our own. I picked out one today that looks pretty cool. It is a Tommy Nelson study so it will be good. It's called DREAM TEAM: The power of two. It is a study designed to strengthen your marriage and I think it is going to benefit both of us. We could always use good stuff like this, but it is particuarly good for us after this season (the work from hell season) of our marriage. I've only done one other Tommy Nelson study and it was great...we actually went to his church in Denton for a short time when we moved to Providence but didn't find personal connections in that church. I also used to hear him speak at Prestonwood to the singles every week before we got married. I'll let you know how that study is going too....maybe we could lead a marriage study at some point if there is a need at Resonate. So, as you can see my plate is going to be pretty full as far as my time to myself. You only get a small amount of mommy time when you have 2 kids running around on totally different schedules.
I hope that I keep up the blogging too when I get home. It is very helpful to write out all the thoughts that circulate in my head...most of the time anyhow! I am sorry if my last post sounded a little harsh...I didn't intend to make it sound like things weren't going well. I was extremely tired and frustrated and suffered from what my husband calls "verbal diarrhea". And I am rambling right now so I will bring this to an end. Please pray that we have a safe trip home! :-)
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